I love you......THIS MUCH!

                           If you've been reading my blog, you understand the fact that I'm not afraid of opening up my past experiences. Good or bad. This blog is gonna be very personal and will expose myself in a new light. Please, be mindful that this is my blog and the things I am going to say, you might not believe in. I invite you though, no matter what you believe in, to pray. Pray to God. He is there. He is real. He isn't this energy that controls everything. He is a real PERSON. He is the first and the last. He is the beginning and the end. Oh wait. There is no end when it comes to our Great GOD! He is our Father. He loves you so much. Pray to feel his love. And when you do, pray in WANTING an answer. God won't answer you if you pray half-heartily. After you've done that, get a bible. C'mon, you know you probably have on lying around the house somewhere. READ IT. It is God's word. (And so is the Book of Mormon, but I'll get to that later). I suggest reading Matthew. Matthew talks about Jesus and his wonderful works, miracles, love and His ultimate sacrifice. Jesus loves so much, just as the Father. They both do. I promise you, that if you ask in faith, God will make it known unto you what you desire to know. With God, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!!!!


                         Okay, so. Here it goes; This summer I've grown closer to God AS EVER. See, before I always thought of Him as this giant up in the sky, controlling everything that goes on in earth. I always imagined him as this powerful being with a lightening bolt and looked like Zeus. (I know, stereotypical by far). But that's how I thought of Him. Well, God wanted me to see Him in a different light. One of my favorite christian singers IN THE WORLD, Kim Walker, open the doors for me. Now, I know what ya'll Mormons are thinking. "Oh my gosh, why would she ever look up to someone who's outside of the Church. I bet Kim Walker doesn't even know the whole truth...blah blah blah." Uhm, HELLO! God told Joseph Smith that other churches had some truth in them too! And we Christians need to stand together. You can tell by the way Kim Walker speaks, she has the spirit of revelation. It's built inside of her. I bet God made her to be one of those people who can get in tune with the spirit better then anyone else. She has a gift.

                         Any who, I was listening to one of her talks. In this particular talk, she was talking about her first "encounter with the Lord." Now, I was like, "Whaaaa." What she means by "encounter with the Lord" is she spent time with God through prayer and spirit. That simple. So, she's talking about how she went to a worship meeting. That day, she was going through some troubling beef. As she is worshipping, she has a vision. She sees Jesus right in front of her. In her mind she thinks, "Okay, I need to ask him two questions." Now, she would never, EVER ask Jesus these two questions ever. I'll explain later why.


                         The two questions were: "How much do you love me?" and "What were you thinking when You created me?". These questions were struggling for Kim to ask because when she was a child someone told her something that made her believe that she was supposed to be a boy, not a girl. She thought God made this big mistake, and that He was just trying to make the best out of a bad situation. Can you believe that? Anyway, at this time in her "encounter" she decides not to ask those two questions. BUT, the worship leader in the Church said something. Something of a miracle. He said "Everyone tonight needs to ask God these two questions...How much do you love me and what were You thinking when you created me." MIRACLE ALERT. It was like the worship leader was prompted by the Spirit to say this. AMAZING.

                     Kim wasn't so crazy about this. Now that the worship leader had said this, she knew that she had to ask Jesus those two nagging questions. So she falls into Jesus's arms, without looking Him in the eyes, and asks, "Jesus, how much do You love me?"


                      In her vision, Jesus takes her and sets her right in front of Him and stretches out his arms left to right. Now his arms are stretching farther and farther until Kim can't see the ends. And Jesus laughs and shouts "THIS IS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU!" Kim is obviously dumb-struck but can't help but laughing
either. She is so overjoyed with her encounter that she almost forgets the second question. She doesn't want to ask Him though so she leaves her vision, and ends the encounter.

                      Skip to a few months later. Kim says she was in a prayer house, spending time with the Lord. When all of sudden she could feel Jesus's presence so thick and so tangible in the room, that she freezes in place. She can actually feel his presense wash throughout the whole room. Then a thought came into her head. "I haven't asked Him the second question. Then she could feel Jesus pleading to her, "Kim, ask me the question." She does.

                     In a blink of an eye Jesus takes her in a workshop room. Kim can see a man on a stool making something. That man is God. God, out of the blue, rips a chunk of something out of his heart. That chunk looked like play-do. God then started molded it, in such precision. Kim, by her surprise, found out that dough was suddenly her. God then placed his beautiful creation in a box. Like a jack in the box. And closed the seal of the box, and waited. He looked very anxious, like a child waiting for Jack to pop out of the box. Then, BAM! Kim jumps out dancing and singing and praising him. God is laughing and dancing around too and shouts "WHOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Then takes Kim and puts her in the box and do the same thing over and over again.

                       As you can imagine, Kim is astonished. Kim tugs at Jesus and asks, "What, What is he doing?" Without any warning Kim is taken from the the side of the workshop and suddenly is in the Father's hands. God then takes her and places her where he ripped out that chunk and she fits in perfectly, like a puzzle piece. IN THE FATHER'S HEART! God then tells her, "Kim, this is where you belong. Right here. In my heart. You are not a mistake. This is what I was thinking when I created you. And you know what? I think you're funny! You make me laugh, Kim! Stay here, Kim. Stay in my heart."

                   Beautiful, right? Inspiring? Yes. I just wanted to show you that an encounter with God can change everything. Can change the way you see, hear, feel and especially your relationship with God. Now, I'm gonna share my encounter. My encounter is much more simpler. Much more plain. But is special to me.

                    So, I'm singing this worship song called "Yahweh". (P.S. if you wanna listen to the song, just go to youtube and type in "Yahweh" by kari jobe). Anyway, as I'm singing the lyrics speak to me like God is speaking to me. The lyrics stated:

               Ancient One, So amazing. I'm unfailing. I am. The ancient one and you sing "So amazing" My heart is with you, my love. Yahweh. Yahweh. Faithful I am. I'm here to stay. Yahweh. Yahweh, I am. Forever and always same. And I am all consuming, ever lasting. God Almighty. Lord, your Lord. And you cry "Lord of Glory"

               As I'm hearing this song, His presence was so strong. I can't control myself. I fall to my knees. It was like He was hugging me. Then I sang a different worship song, because I wanted to continue to feel His amazing presence. The song goes like this:

              The more I seek you
               The I find you
               The more I find you, the more I love you
                I wanna sit at your feet, drink from cup in Your hand
                  Lay back against you and breathe
                       Feel Your heartbeat
                            This love is so deep, it's more than I can stand
                                I melt in your peace, it's overwhelming



                      Then His presense was even stronger. It was like I was in this valley and he was sitting beside a tree and I was right beside Him, with other girls and boys. It was beautiful. It was my encounter.


                    I now invite you to pray right now. With a full intent. God will answer. I'll suggest some worship songs right now, if music is your style.

                  Suggestions: "Yahweh" by kari jobe. "The More I seek You" by Kari Jobe. "Oh how He loves Us" by Jesus Culture. Basically anything by Jesus Culture or Kari Jobe. You can find all their songs on youtube. God bless!