So I went to this Bishop's fireside today. (In simpler terms, for my non-Mormon blog-readers that basically means that we go to our pastor's house and we do some games and learn more about God and his Word) and was just astonished and offended on the profanity that went on. No, it wasn't necessarily crud language...but wait...it actually was. Just not the "cuss word" language. More like the language bullies speak; ignorance.
Many people wonder what kind of man I will marry when I grow up. Quick side note.
1) I am gay, so that probably won't happen
2) If I wasn't, it would most likely not be an LDS man, unless by some miracle I find one that isn't like the ones I've seen in this fireside. (But there are definitely good Mormon men in my ward and local church...don't get me wrong.)
And another quick side note before I explain what happened at the fireside.
I remember one day, my sister brought one of her friends to a church youth activity. A nice young man who seemed to forget her name because my sister's friend had been to some activities before, asked her what her name was. One of the other young men in my church, walked by with a sneering expression and said, "loser".
To some that may seem playfully harmless, (Not to me), but to that non-member friend of my sister...she was completely and utterly hurt. She hasn't really come back often due to the fact that she thinks most, not all, but most of the men there are rude.
Hmmmmm. I wonder why.
So, skip back to the fireside that took place today. We played a game and then got some free time to talk to the other youth. Here are just some of things that the youth were saying about others, in particularly what the young men were saying.
"Ha. Look at him. He looks like a serial killer. Don't let him near us."
"Ew. There is a gay reference in the movie Frozen? That shouldn't be for children's eyes."
"MOVE, WOMAN."
"Shut up. Nobody cares." (A young man said this repeatedly to me whenever I would voice my opinion...and he was the same one who called my sister's friend a loser...)
"Look, she's so ugly"...
Now don't get me twisted. There are a few, rare good men in our youth program. But I just don't think that's okay.
And it seemed that I was the only one noticing these things and taking some action. Some of them of coarse accused me of being over-sensitive. But am I really? The suicide rates are rising. The eating disorder rates are rising. And so are the bullying.
So, it looks like everyone else is de-sensitizing. Trying to pretend that "it" isn't there. "it" being the sly bullying that goes on in this world today. Even in the walls of our churches.
This, of coarse, is not new. Jesus went through this. He was ridiculed for being who He was...and for defending and loving ones that were known to be "unpopular".
Now, let me just say this. I don't swear. But when it comes to this, it's something I feel strongly about and this subject...I would die for.
I swear, if I had to choose between living a life full of ignoring the real issues of the day like bullying and never being able to defend others...and live a life of complete silence against them...I would rather die.
I am disgusted at the way some youth act like. We need to change this. There has been too many suicides. Too many attempts. Too many lives taken...for such a cause that can be improved.
I am planning definitely to speak to my ward members about this issue. And it isn't just the young men. It's all the youth, including the young women. The ones who snicker at the victimizing comments are just as worse as the one who said those awful words.
And the leaders need to do something about it too. It can't just be me. Or another person...who happens to be a youth as well. LDS leaders...if you see bullying, even a hint, CONFRONT THE PROBLEM. I don't know how much I can stress this enough. I've seen countless of look-aways from the youth leaders that I've become immune to it so much that it feels like I am obligated to take their place and keep things in order. Of coarse, I do not mind this. I love breaking down a bullying situation. But it can't just be one person. It has to be us ALL.
I thought this was the Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints.
It is I guess.
Just without the Jesus Christ.
We need to change that.
And we can. It's pretty simple.
And of coarse again, there will be hate for this.
There will always be someone ridiculing someone else because they are taking off the stigma of unpopular taboos.
It's funny too...that we talk so much about how we must be kind. Yet it seems like some of the meanest people come from my own church. I don't know.
It just doesn't feel right.
So help me change this. It doesn't have to be this way. And if you're bully, you can change too. Actually, it was a huge probability that the bully is the way he/she is because they were bullied as well.
Sure, we may not be able to stop all hate...but at least we can try.
And to help motivate you...here's a little video about Ellen Page (ONE OF MY FAVORITE PEOPLE EVER) talk in the Human Rights Campaign talk about the work and service of defending others at the TIME TO THRIVE conference. (You may have watched this video before...I just love it so much...)
P.S. Sorry for all the parenthesis quotations.
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